More word plays

She's happy to make a pair of pants for you, or at least sew its seams.

Those who jump off a Paris bridge are in Seine.

The dead batteries were given out free of charge.

Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.

A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it was a weapon of math disruption.

A cardboard belt would be a waist of paper.

He said I was average - but he was just being mean.

It's a fact, taller people sleep longer in bed.

Did you hear about the fire at the circus? The heat was in tents.

You feel stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.

She was the apple of his eye and he liked to sit down be cider.

If you leave alphabet soup on the stove and go out, it could spell disaster.

In a recession, the most secure job is garbage-man. Business is always picking up.

A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.

If a judge loves the sound of his own voice, expect a long sentence.

The primary responsibility for a child's education is apparent.

The liquor store advertised, 'We De-Liver.'

Seven days without a pun makes one weak.